Student Motivation Crash Course: Helping Your Child Stay Focused Across the School Year

We speak to thousands of parents in our fortnightly support webinars. After each session, parents often ask about motivation—or the lack thereof—in their children. 

From questions like “How do I even get my child to start studying?” to debates around the pros and cons of goal-setting and study incentives, motivation is a recurring theme. 

In this article, we’ll tackle your most frequently asked questions and provide practical tips to help your child find their drive and stay motivated throughout the school year. 

Firstly, Can I Motivate My Child? 

The short answer: Unless you’re Tony Robbins or a top sports psychologist, probably not! 

Motivation isn’t an external power or force you can simply apply to your child—it has to come from within. However, as a parent, you play a critical role in creating the right environment for motivation to flourish. Think of yourself then less as an applicator of motivation, and more as a curator, setting up conditions that encourage your child to self-motivate. 

Here’s how. 

Why Isn’t My Child Motivated? 

If your child isn’t motivated, ask yourself these three questions: 

1. Does Your Child Have a Goal? 

Motivation often starts with a goal. Without a goal, most people just aim to maintain the status quo. In this situation, it’s easy for students to feel aimless and unmotivated. If your child doesn’t have a clear objective, consider these two reasons why: 

• They haven’t thought about it yet. In this case, start a conversation about their future (see Step 3 below for tips). 

• They don’t see the point. Past struggles or poor performance can lead to a “why bother?” mindset. If this sounds familiar, check out our article on Mindset and Overcoming Past Disappointment.

  
  

2. Does Your Child Believe They Can Achieve Their Goal? 

A high goal—like getting into a university course with an ATAR of 99—can feel overwhelming, and it’s often where students start (and end) their goal setting process. They’ll tend to start by asking themselves what course they want to study and where. From there, the entry requirements. Then from there, the conclusion that an ATAR of 99 is simply impossible. When this happens, it drains their motivation and may lead to self-sabotaging behaviours like procrastination. If this resonates with you right now, focus on building confidence and breaking goals into smaller, achievable steps – read our article on Mindset to see how.

3. Is the Goal Truly Theirs? 

Finally, sometimes students lack motivation because the goal they’re working towards isn’t their own. When goals are driven by parental or peer expectations rather than personal aspirations, motivation becomes harder to sustain. We refer to this as an Externally Referenced Goal – a goal that is more representative of social pressure and expectations as opposed to internal desires. 

To combat this, help your child set Internally Referenced Goals—objectives that reflect their interests and dreams, not anyone else's. 

 

How Should My Child Set Their Goal? 

To create meaningful, motivating and Internally Referenced goals, follow this step-by-step process:

1. Identify interests: What hobbies or activities does your child enjoy? Think about sports, gaming, or music. 

2. Brainstorm careers: List jobs or career paths related to these interests. For example, soccer could lead to coaching, sports journalism, or physiotherapy. 

3. Research qualifications: Look up the courses, TAFE programs, or degrees required for these careers. 

4. Dive into course content: Explore specific university units or TAFE modules online. This can ignite excitement—or help rule out options. 

5. Set entrance requirements: Once they’ve chosen a pathway, note the required ATAR or prerequisites. 

   
   

This process creates a clear, personal, and actionable goal. As we mentioned above though, this isn’t the end of their goal-setting journey. Read our article on breaking down goals into smaller steps to help this goal feel more achievable. 

What Does a Good Goal Look Like? 

A strong goal has these characteristics: 

• Personal: It’s something your child genuinely wants to achieve. 

• Specific: It includes details like the course name, institution, and entrance requirements. 

• Believable: Your child feels confident they can achieve it (as above here, read our article on breaking down goals into smaller steps to help get there).

• Visual: Write the goal down and display it in their study space, along with photos of the university or career path. This way, every time your child sits down to study, they’re instantly reminded why they’re there. 

Should I Use Incentives to Motivate My Child? 

Offering rewards (or, let’s be honest, bribes) can seem like a quick fix. However, research suggests that external incentives can backfire, undermining your child’s long-term motivation. Which is good news for you if you were saving up for that new game or that holiday! 

You want your child to feel motivated because their goal is important and meaningful to them (Internally Referenced) - this is what will ensure long-term motivation. So instead, focus on fostering intrinsic motivation by helping your child set goals that matter to them personally, as with the steps above. This approach leads to more sustainable effort and results. 

How Do I Get My Child Interested in Setting a Goal? 

This is the second most common question we get from parents: “My child doesn’t have a goal, and we can’t broach the subject with them, so how do we get them started?”.  

This unfortunately is the hard part. The ability to broach the topic and have it willingly received by your child is going to be a product of where your relationship is currently, and the degree to which such conversations have happened in the past.  

If you’re not getting anywhere to date and you don’t have a receptive audience, the fastest and easiest way to short-cut the frustration on both sides can be to have someone external broach the topic.  

Goal setting is a critical component of Elevate’s 1-on-1 coaching process. We:  

1. Partner up your child with a recent top university graduate. Someone who has just been through the process recently, who your child can relate to, who can get them talking about the topic of goal-setting.  

2. Walk them through, step-by-step, the process outlined above so that they actually have a goal that is relevant and compelling.  

3. Tackle the problems around mindset and help them develop the belief that they can achieve their goal. 

Motivation is a Journey 

Motivating your child isn’t about forcing them to study—it’s about helping them discover what drives them. By setting clear, personal goals and creating a supportive environment, you can empower your child to take ownership of their academic journey and thrive. 

For more tips and personalised coaching, get in touch.